your welcome
--- On Tue, 2/24/09, Brenda Sherfey <brenwesims@gmail.com> wrote:
From: Brenda Sherfey <brenwesims@gmail.com>
Subject: objects_for_Sims2 Re: FW: OLDIES BUT GOODIES
To: objects-for-sims@googlegroups.com
Date: Tuesday, February 24, 2009, 11:35 AM
Very nice LOL! My husband is sending it to his friend who is a
Magistrate in England, I know he'll get a kick out of it Thanks!
Brenda
On 2/24/09, Dloaks@aol.com <Dloaks@aol.com> wrote:
> ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>
>
> In a message dated 2/24/2009 10:15:05 A.M. Central Standard Time,
> bobokop@yahoo.gr writes:
>
> amazing!!
>
> --- Óôéò Ôñßô., 24/02/09, ï/ç sharon kinsey
<sherryandnuco@yahoo.com>
> Ýãñáøå:
>
> Áðü: sharon kinsey <sherryandnuco@yahoo.com>
> ÈÝìá: objects_for_Sims2 FW: OLDIES BUT GOODIES
> Ðñïò: objects-for-sims@googlegroups.com
> Çìåñïìçíßá: Ôñßôç, 24 ÖåâñïõÜñéïò 2009, 2:41
>
> i think it ironic that my friend that sent this to me works for an
> attorney,lol
>
> --- On Mon, 2/23/09, Sheila Hall <SheilaH@BELLNUNNALLY.com> wrote:
>
> From: Sheila Hall <SheilaH@BELLNUNNALLY.com>
> Subject: FW: OLDIES BUT GOODIES
> To: kfrachiseur53@windstream.net, cowgirlup.pilotcar@yahoo.com,
> vicodiniscool69@yahoo.com, frank.arthur29@yahoo.com,
> twisted-soul@sbcglobal.net,
> nancyw1@windstream.net, mls2780@aol.com, sherryandnuco@yahoo.com,
> susan.rowe@figdav.com
> Date: Monday, February 23, 2009, 5:06 PM
>
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> The dumb questions and smart answers will make you laugh out loud.
> I know they've been around before, but I enjoyed them for a second
> time and thought you might, too.
>
>
> ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
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> These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are
> things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now
> published
> by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these
> exchanges were actually taking place.
>
> ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
> WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
> ____________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
> WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
> ____________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
> WITNESS: Yes.
> ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
> WITNESS: I forget.
> ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you
forgot?
> ___________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
> WITNESS: We both do.
> ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
> WITNESS: We do.
> ATTORNEY: You do?
> WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
> ________ ____________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: Now doctor, "isn't it true that when a person dies in
his sleep,
> he doesn't know about it until the next morning?"
> WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
> ____________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
> WITNESS: He's twenty, much like your IQ.
> ___________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
> WITNESS: Are you shitting me?
> _________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
> WITNESS: Yes.
> ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
> WITNESS: Getting laid
> ____________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
> WITNESS: Yes.
> ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
> WITNESS: None.
> ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
> WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney.
> Can I get a new attorney?
> ____________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
> WITNESS: By death.
> ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
> WITNESS: Take a guess..
> ____________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
> WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
> ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
> WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.
> _____________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition
> notice, which I sent to your attorney?
> WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
> ______________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead
> people?
> WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
> _________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK?
> What school did you go to?
> WITNESS: Oral.
> _________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
> WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
> ATTORNEY: And, Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
> WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
> ____________________________________________
>
> ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
> WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?
> ______________________________________
>
> And the best for last:
>
> ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a
> pulse?
> WITNESS: No.
> ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
> WITNESS: No.
> ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
> WITNESS: No.
> ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you
> began
> the autopsy?
> WITNESS: No ..
> ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
> WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
> ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive,
> nevertheless?
> WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing
> law .
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> ____________________________________
> Need a job? _Find an employment agency near you_
>
(http://yellowpages.aol.com/search?query=employment_agencies&ncid=emlcntusyelp00000003)
> .
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> ____________________________________
> Access 350+ FREE radio stations anytime from anywhere on the web. _Get
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